“We fall for us to learn how to rise up again. We fear so that we’ll know how to be courageous. We fade so that we’ll be able to repaint ourselves back… “
Some things were really just meant to be broken… why? I have no idea… I have written on my previous blog post a statement where in it sounds like or rather seems like I have promised that I will be an academic scholar on my 3rd year first semester… I expected so much from myself… I think I still don’t know me.
Every individual who belongs on my circle of friends believes so much in me more than I trust myself now. Every one expects that this person, the one in front of them can do no wrong… the way he speaks and his gestures talk. He seems to be like a candle light in a path of darkness… yes, at times I glow but I cannot escape from the fact that all lights even the sun’s can one day lose its own brightness.
I was once a glowing star during my high school days. All of my teachers know me well, that I am an outstanding student. It even reached the time when my teacher introduced me to a department head and that’s when I was well known… the former department head of the mathematics department, the science department, and once by the filipino department head… I was once presented in front of these individuals by my homeroom class advisers. Although I was not that popular in the whole school I felt contented and valued whenever I see that my instructors recognizes me… and knows and remembers my ‘angelic name’…J
Annually in my four years of studying on my Alma Mater I never missed to be on the list of the recognized student… if medals, then there will be certificates of recognition given… I thought I was the best. That it was my shinning moment, that I can continue leaving footprints wherever I go… my mind was filled with air… I felt I was starting to float… I do not belong on the Star section but I know I can dance with their music… that’s how much I believe in myself… (That was during my high school days…)
My college life became rough during my first semester but I managed to get back on track the following semesters… (2nd semester and summer) second year first semester, my major subjects got high on me… I was buried deep down… Second year, second semester, mid- term… I thought I was doing fine… oh no… not fine, make it good… but I went into a roller coaster ride while making my way to the finals… the result? I felt so much dizziness within me… my mind was going in circles… I was too confident that I myself was the one who dug my own pit. I started falling down…
My friends do believe that I do good on my academics that is why they think that I am just making fools out of them when I am telling them that I failed to get into the ceiling of being an academic scholar… but that’s when I realized that life isn’t always pure light, glow or brightness… sometimes we need to experience living in the dark for our eyes to pursue and seek for brightness… to look for better ways on how to grow, as a person, as an individual… lessons in life makes us stronger… that’s what I know... and I am learning to accept the fact that not all things that you are wanting will always be given to you. We are created not to be an indelible and perfect human being. We each have our rooms for improvement and we cannot fill them if we already consider ourselves perfect…
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, if you make little actions then you’ll probably get less reaction. But what if you make huge actions and yet you still get tiny, little reactions? Maybe that’s the time not to think of another possible action but to find better solutions, remedies and be able to resist the trials…
We need to move out of our comfort zones… “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction… We fall for us to learn how to rise up again. We fear so that we’ll know how to be courageous. We fade so that we’ll be able to repaint ourselves back…
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